Empowered Voices

Bippidty boppity boo! What stories did I get dragged into?! Why is my second ex husband acting crazy just like my first one? Why the fuck do I live in a world where men feel I exist for them?! Strangers are predicting future events that are coming true in my life and I don't know how I feel about it. The universe is asking me to let go of more people and I don't know how much more my heart can take. Universe I would like a sign... well I didn't expect that many. When I say my life is like a movie I mean my life is like a movie. The supernatural woo woo has just begun!

You call it love but it feels like a battle. Your head is turned by other women and you pimp me out to your friends and peers. I'm only wanted when your bored, lonely or horny and now you are telling me you dated me with the intention to change me. You say I'm the problem but how do you expect me to build a home when you make it a warzone? What supernatural movie did I walk into?!

He said it was a contract behind closed doors. Expecting the benefits of a married couple. Nitpicking everything about me. Begging for a threesome with my best friend a woman I considered a best friend. When the spotlight was on we were married but he didn't even like me as he picked the pieces of me he would accept and wished away the parts he didn't want. Starting a job with hope for a beautiful future and being exposed to being overworked and Underpaid, sexually assaulted, rumor spread and illegally fired. Trying to heal a mind broken by the choices of all the people from my life's journey while battling silent battles alone. What do you expect when your inner world creates your reality. You can't run from you as the manifestor of your story.

People say they have faith but will they walk the talk? What if a higher power told you that everything would be ok would you leap or hold onto what is familiar? I made one of the biggest decisions of my life and everything about it hurt and deep down it felt like the right choice. A second marriage in Vegas, doubts and fear oh my. What kind of life awaited me in Germany and I leapt into the unknown ready to build something stable for the most precious treasure in the world.. my son. It was going to be the change to finally create my happily ever after... or was it?

Told your whole life your family loves you and will be with you no matter how hard life gets. Until they show you what it means to be the enemy of the family. Going from being the scapegoat to the most wanted with an emotional bounty on your head. A new single mother after going through a terrifying divorce, a mind that is unraveling from consistent psychological warfare you have dealt with since you were a child. Societal expectations and a way of life that demands you keep functioning to survive after you have had less than a normal life. Parents and siblings giving up on you and your kid. PTSD, depression. anxiety, and making a decision that starts to break generational cycles your ancestors couldn't break.

I just wanted fucking Peace but everyone around me acted like I owed them my life. Who the fuck meets their future husband in virtual reality? Mom I'm a 27 year old divorced single mother! I'm going and you can't stop me! Why do I have to keep going through the fire!! Germany?! Home maybe?? My life has twists and turns in my world called wonderland, a strange and unorthodox type of life full of survival as the humans around me tried to play god with my existence.

Death threats, x rays, stalking, harassment, paranoia and fear. Did you really know who you married or did you see what you wanted to see? Terror and uncertainty at every corner, never knowing what would happen next. My fairy tale and the family I had tried to create was ripped from me and in its place stood a man that was willing to hurt me. Living out ancestral cycles, my woman ancestors endured the universe was asking me will you break the loop or pass it down? In a relationship with a man that tells you he owns you through his behavior and words.

Covid changed the game when it took over the world. For some their lives transformed in beautiful ways but for others it was the event that caused our world to fall apart. Without in person interactions what was I to do? Maybe go into a virtual world and live a double life? He said he forgave me but it wasn't forgiveness it was strategy and when the marriage ended I saw sides of someone I was married to for almost 6 years. Exposed to obsessive controlling behavior that has a person wondering who the fuck did I marry? Sometimes the abused don't realize they are being abused until they leave.

Nobody prepared me for the events that would unfold after I had my son via C-section. Men don't understand what a woman goes through just for being born into a female body. What it's like to lose connection with your body and mind. Then add in a secret you carry for two years that nearly kills you: your spouse is not sure if they want to be a woman or man, relocation, a mysterious stomach illness that leads to you having to change your entire diet, bed bug infestation, loud neighbors, and COVID it could make one go insane.

Women were not born for the pleasure of a man, nor the pleasure of another human at all. This is our life and no one is God over us and the body we call our home. But for centuries other humans have played god over our lives and those who will do anything to survive target the weak and innocent. Growing up in the world I was told what I could be because my body was female. I grew up in the Mormon Church aka the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. Brainwashed since I was little to believe my body was meant to have babies because of its capabilities. I had a c section and I had my baby but it came at a cost. Men think it's 50/50 when you have a baby my ex believed it was the same process for him... it's not and I share my experiences and thoughts about these beliefs that have been forced on women for 100s of years.